When a Loved One Is Dying from Cancer – Episode 201
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Featuring: Myles and Katharine Weiss
Published: February 1, 2020
Myles and Katharine Weiss, ministers with a focus on marriage, share professional insight about how to help someone in various stages of grief. Their experience will give you tools to love those who might be grieving.
Myles and Katharine Weiss, ministers with a focus on marriage, speak with Rev. Percy McCray about how to love a grieving person well. First, they mention the common idea of the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. “Now, they don’t always happen in a linear fashion… so, when you are feeling these things, it is not permanent, and you are not crazy. These are important stages of the process, whether you are the sick person or the family of the sick person,” Myles says.
When helping someone in a stage of grief, Myles suggests discerning what the person needs most. “Is this a time for me to instruct and to intervene and to speak into, or this a time just for me to be with the person?” In other words, allowing the grieving person to lead the process. Katharine adds, “We need to be in sync with Him (God) as He leads each person through their experience.”
Even though death and dying appear complicated, we can love well if we listen well. “People grieve differently in different ways under different sets of circumstances,” Rev. McCray says. “It is natural to fight what we call death because God has put inside of us an eternal spirit and it is not going to die—it is going to live on forever.” But when loving someone through the unknown journey of grief, “There is power in allowing some time to allow that process to unfold.”
- “We are really not dying to cease to exist. We are dying to actually be resurrected to greater life.”
- “Planting seeds…and being a loving presence that demonstrates and embodies the life of Christ may be doing much more than you actually know and what you hear.”
- “Be with them…help them experience what they are experiencing.”
The Five Stages of Grief